I remember my English teacher Ms. Sullivan speaking of the power of the pen verses the sword.  I never truly understood that concept until I began working as a journalist for a newspaper at the King City Rustler in California, where by the end of my short tenure there I regularly found my name on the front page.  I was given a taste of regularly penning a column called Amy’s Imaginings and was later solicited for a job by a fairly high powered federal congressman as a direct result of my somewhat public personae in that area.  This was a short interim career for me, as I was soon called back to my original love the horse, but a highly educational one. 

​

I learned the power of the pen is only strong if supported from the top, as the minute this newspaper was purchased from the local family based business by a large company, their concern for the overall wellbeing of the local community disappeared and directly affected my ability to write and publish unbiased pertinent coverage.  I also learned that even at its best (working for a sympathetic successful congressmen deeply seated in his community, with minimal concern for being ousted) I still had little stomach for the harsh reality of politics in this country.

   

My blogging, philosophies, stories and articles I’ve posted on this website weren’t really planned, but more a development required by a desire to survive in the U.S. Hunter Jumper industry.  As I’ve inherited a personae in this world through a naturally unfolding career and story, I’ve found myself regularly coming up against misconceptions on all sorts of levels.   I’ve slowly learned that I’ve amassed a silent but none the less quite powerful readership, and so I’ve decided to stop playing politics myself and lay it all out there as I’ve factually experienced it. 

​

The reality of it is there are some strong forces working pretty hard at keeping me financially at bay, and lately simply trying to destroy any ability I might have to succeed as I close in on producing horses it’s hard to deny the quality of.  It’s only recently that I’ve even begun connecting the dots and become aware of a pretty harsh guerilla type warfare against my reputation, the most important thing a professional has in this industry.  I’ve been dealing with for over 20 years now, of a 33 year professional career as I received my first paid horse training job at the age of 14. 

​

The intense corruption operating within this world at the highest level is something I’ve been aware of, and sort of tried to tread lightly around, making occasional comments on my website or to friends, but not really willing to take it head on (and sometimes frankly working to appease it). But at the end of the day, the only weapon one has against those who have most of the resources and power and only play by the rules they’ve created, is the bright light of the truth and the hope that some will be able to see past all the charades designed to cover it. 

​

In my 33 years, it was easier for me to sell off the track thoroughbreds as a teenager than it is for me to now sell Irish sport horses of top rare nearly lost bloodline quality with proven nationally recognized show records that are statically beating every breeding odd.  I’ve bred and brought multiple horses 99% by myself to the Grand Prix ring and have been in and out of this venue for 10 years now, I shoe my own horses, and my dedication to the horse, teachings and philosophies have ranged from transforming local lives to affecting some of the top horseman in the country.  I am one of the few trainers I know of who can say I have presented every horse I’ve ever sold exactly as it was, and have never made any financial gains in any sort of a criminal or questionable method (some insinuated, none documented or verified in any justifiable manner).  Other than the financial struggle as a business owner which is common knowledge, my record as a professional horseman is spotless on every disputed level.   I work my tail off so regardless of how business is going, my horses receive the best and most natural of care, and any one that knows me in any capacity can attest to this. 

 

Regardless of all this I find myself hated by some, most of whom I’ve never even met at the top of the industry.  I was accosted by a USEF course designer named Ryan Beals at dinner one night, who called me a professional liar and basically laid out every insult he could in one conversation, and when I appealed to USEF for a formal apology from this professional I barely knew, they basically laughed at me.  I’ve had stewards and Olympic gold medal winning horseman I’ve never met watching every move I make at horse shows, accusing me of not watering my horses or not using enough bedding, beyond ridiculous (sometimes they drink the bucket dry and it takes a minute to refill it, and not all of us believe in wasting an entire forest to bed one stall for a few days).   Especially considering this is an industry that has much more serious, major acknowledged problems of which I’ve never had or wanted any part of.  And I’ve had to fight to get horses registered in any sort of a timely manner with the Performance Horse Registry, run by USEF.    

 

I’ve had a formal protest from a USEF steward (I had to answer in a duel for my professional life) for using my seat in the ring too strongly with Deluca Ace, a mare that could be hot, was always powerful, close to 17 hands and running through the bit at that moment.  While at the same show I watched a popularly backed trainer repeatedly spur the heck out of a horse in the warm up, and not receive so much as a glance from this same steward.

​

Clients that have been close friends one moment have been turned against me the minute another trainer gets their hands on them and every time I’m close to selling a horse for real money to a serious horseman, it’s as if someone with incredible clout in the industry gets a hold of them, all of the sudden these buyers are no longer interested (without even trying the horse) and disappear.  Considering I am one sale away from being totally liquid and in good financial stead, and 2 – 3 sales away from making every one who has ever backed me very happy (as long as you were patient and didn’t go after me with a bill collector or a lawyer) this is more than a little frustrating!  It is not my imagination … after 20 years of the same scenario there is definitely something ‘screwy with that wrascally wrabbit’ going on here.

 

Here is what I’ve connected all the dots to know has been the main problem.  I made an enemy of George Morris in the mid 1990s when I began riding under his assistant trainer Chris Kappler, and refused to where a spur on an off the track thoroughbred I had carefully developed. And while I know this is a legendary horseman regarded with hush tones throughout the industry (being the self proclaimed king of equitation, writing books, winning gold as a coach of the US Olympic team, and being showcased and highlighted by USEF, The Practical Horseman, The Chronical, etc, more than any other single horseman in the country by a landslide) my experiences with him as a legitimate if not struggling professional have been that of a corrupt elitist tyrant who feels it is well within his right to snuff out anyone who may have something less than stellar to say about him, and who doesn’t have in his approximation, the resources to really fight back.

    

So here are my experiences in summarized form from the beginning, and you can judge for yourself.  All of these experiences can be backed factually by documentation and witnesses.  I also need to preface, some of what I’m about to say here I’ve barely ever mentioned even to close friends, and have definitely never spoken of publicly.  I have in the past tried to play the ever present politics a bit and avoid poking the dragon.  But I guess now I feel I’m enough of a known quantity (if not always liked at the very least respected) to lift the proverbial sword and fight back, instead of constantly being burned every time I try to make a move in a positive direction in this work. 

Many of the names I’ll mention here are well known horseman I actually have quite a bit of respect for as trainers.  But, being a successful whistle blower doesn’t really grant one the luxury of omitting facts.  And to be honest, if you thought an investigative reporting, militarized, horse shoeing, Grand prix producing breeder, trainer and rider was the right way to go with your over time obvious political corruption and professional slander, you have seriously misjudged and underestimated me and deserve to at the very least be put under the microscope of scrutiny here (and potentially in a much more public venue).

​

It started in 1995 when I went to a clinic with Chris Kappler (in 2004 he won the Olympic team gold and silver individual medal) in in Barrington, IL.  The clinic went well and was informative, and so I decided I would try riding with him in at the Tampa, FL horse show in 1996 for a few weeks.  I went down with a couple of really nice off the track thoroughbreds I had scoured the country looking for, these 2 being the best of about 5 I had collected in hopes of reaching the open jumper ring.  Chris was then George Morris’s assistant trainer.  George had yet to coach the Olympic team at this point (he would become the official Chef d’ equipe in 2003 maintain this position for 10 years), and Chris was many years away from winning the Silver Individual medal, but George had a strong international record and was quite influential as a clinician and trainer. 

Both horses were going well; Mr. Tipton (aka Walter) in the hunter ring (who I had decided needed a slower more conservative start) and Sweet Baby James in the jumper ring.  For some reason after weeks of riding with him (via the clinic and the horse show), Chris suddenly decided I had to ride with a spur.  I was given the impression it was one of George’s rules (i.e. if you want to ride with us this is just how it is) and he was open to the length stating it could be practically non-existent.  But the entire scenario felt less than welcoming, and struck me as a lack of concern for the need of the horse, and an over concern for conformity.

 

If it had been a 10 year old warmblood, and not a 6 year old off the track thoroughbred I’d spent the last year carefully settling, if we could have had a conversation about the philosophy behind it, perhaps I wouldn’t have given it a second thought.  But I had been looking for horses for almost a year, and found these at two various locations in Texas and actually had to compete with a local Grand Prix rider for the right to purchase James, and ended up having to agree to buy two to get this one horse.  So he felt special, I was attached, and I had already heard a few stories about George getting strong with thoroughbreds from Katie Monahan in a lecture at that show (i.e. making them hot) in his desire to dictate that even sensitive jumpers must accept leg and spur. So Chris and I decided to part ways, it didn’t seem as if it was that big a deal to either one of them at the time, and frankly it really wasn’t that big of a deal to me.  Not all trainers, riders and horses gel; you get use to this concept when searching for a good eye on the ground and simply move on. 

​

At the end of the 3 or 4 weeks in Tampa I was hoping to sell one of the horses, and started showing them to various trainers.  I ended up showing Walter to George, and he felt the horse’s front end was a little too low to take seriously.  But Walter was a drop dead gorgeous 17 hand bay thoroughbred gelding, with an upright topline, movement and a sweet temperament second to none, and we caught the attention of Micahel Matz (an international world championship and pan am games medaling grand prix rider, and a national child saving hero to boot. Michael had been sitting with a young McLain Ward (who later won multiple team Olympic gold medals and the world cup) watching the showing of Walter to George at the stalls next to the ring.  As George left, Michael came over, asked what I wanted for him and wanted to try him. 

It felt a little as if there might be a competition between these two high powered trainers, but again, I barely gave this scenario a second thought as well, as competition among trainers in hunter jumper land is par for the course.  Michael had a reputation for being a careful slow grand prix rider-trainer with a known ability to work with sensitive thoroughbreds, and I thought I was incredibly lucky to have his interest.  We agreed he would take Walter home to try for a couple of weeks, and I was thrilled with the potential buyer and sale in spite of George’s thumbs down. 

    

Michael warned me that his working student would mostly be riding Walter, and called me a few weeks later to tell me the horse just wasn’t working out and he was going to send him home to me.  I’m honestly not exactly sure what happened, but Walter came home an entirely different horse.  The sweet, sensitive yet very pliable thoroughbred was in good physical condition but a mental wreck.  He ground his teeth continuously (something he never even thought about doing before) and was so stiff and tense under saddle he could barely maintain an even rhythm at the trot (and this horse had been quietly softly galloping around 3’ hunter courses in Tampa). 

 

Looking back on it, I assume someone put draw reins on him and attempted to quickly educate him to the acceptance of whatever it is they felt he needed to learn, but the attempt definitely backfired.  Or maybe it was purposeful? An experience years later with a separate horse would leave me wondering.  Regardless,  I could no longer ride this lovely thoroughbred without becoming quite upset at what I felt underneath me compared to what he had been, and so I sold him cheaply to one of my best friends at the time as a dressage horse.  This friend, having known him pre and post Tampa, and hoping to get him back to pre with a slow dressage regimen, told me a few years later Walter never recovered and was never the same.  Being a little intimidated by the stature of the trainers I was involved with, I never contacted Michael to ask what had happened.  I simply decided from that point forward there were no more trials on horses without a painful deposit which would not be returned if the horse didn’t come back in the same condition they were given in, regardless of who the trainer was or their reputation. 

​

Having gone through what I’ve been through now 20 years later, and realizing that George was much more irritated with my refusal to put a spur on my thoroughbreds (and Michael’s liking a horse of mine enough to try it, that George didn’t), I can’t help but wonder if he didn’t somehow influence this situation.  The state this horse returned in was much more something I would have expected from George (being not the most delicate with thoroughbreds), and not any working student of Michaels. I’ve had many dozens of working students over the years, and they train and ride exactly as I have educated them to.  To add even more mystery, Michael rode on the Atlantic Olympic team that following summer, and the team won the silver medal.  A few years later he disappeared from the Hunter Jumper world, and became a professional thoroughbred race horse trainer.  It was something he was obviously quite good at, as he later won the Kentucky Derby with the horse Barbaro, but to completely leave the industry was a bit odd to say the least.  Later in 2006, he became an honorary recognized member of the Hunter Jumper Hall of Fame, an organization run by guess who?… George Morris. 

​

After the Tampa experience, given the generally accepted fact that up and coming trainers and riders either pursue a career on the East Coast or the West Coast, I decided to head West.  I spent several weeks at the HITS Indio show in California, and felt a stronger welcome there as a young trainer with a group of thoroughbreds.  I was invited to a nice farm in Chico, where I was treated well and showed several of the horses, and interviewed for a job as a head trainer-manager at a B-C circuit (with hopes for the A circuit) hunter jumper barn in Sacramento, California.  Much to my delight, I landed this job, and we all moved to Sacramento, California a few months later. 

About a year in to the work there things were going well.  I was getting along with the owners, had a group of 20 some boarders and 40 students and we regularly attended and succeeded at local shows with my occasionally hitting an A circuit shows.  I struggled a bit with the amount of time I spent in the ring (often 12 hour days) and the training my own horses, and I had yet to learn how to draw boundaries with clients (my front door on the farm and phone was open for business 24 hours a day and 7 days a week), but overall I’d say we were a happy family. 

     

Around this same time I naively decided to attend a clinic with George Morris being held at one of the more prestigious A Show barns in Sacramento.  I attended it with James, and the horse and I performed beautifully in the professional division, as well or better than any other team.  In spite of this, George was extremely unpleasant to personally ride under.  While there was clearly a client or two he was quite bent on highlighting positively, he had a minor meltdown over my not knowing which side of my horse’s neck the loose rein should be on (nor knowing some obscure term to describe it), and then proceeded to tell me I had an emotional complex.

 

Having been raised in a military family and recently coming out of the Army National Guard myself (and the clinic was paid for), like any good soldier I just ignored it and kept riding to the best of my ability. But I was clearly under a drill sergeant type fire for those two days.  As I watched George kiss up to a father standing in the middle of the ring with a daughter on a nice bay warmblood gelding, and then proceeded to watch him thoroughly train this horse how not to go anywhere near jumping a brush fence (something the animal did quite well at the beginning of the clinic) I began to come up with some philosophies of my own regarding this known trainer.  I had also watched him show in the 1.30m division in Tampa, and was sort of stunned to see this internationally acclaimed rider thoroughly miss the distance at a low vertical on an easy gelding, and have the rail (something say I might do at that time).

 

I remember thinking, if your pockets are deep enough you can buy a top horse, and apparently you don’t really need to be that good even to compete at the international level.  George Morris, OK horseman I guess in exactly the right scenario with the right horse (basically indestructible), a good observer of quality and success, a very good theorizer, and a very, very good politician.  And I sort of left it at that.  He already had too much of a name for me to actively spread this opinion, and it is not generally in my nature, so I never did.  But if someone would ask me directly, I would say something like he obviously can teach and probably has some good information (many of my students would often watch his clinics and we would later talk about his ideas), but I don’t think he’s a God in the horse world, and I do think he’s a very good politician.

      

Funnily enough, shortly after the California clinic, I started having problems with the wealthier parents of several of my students.  These parents would make mean insulting comments and generally a tone of disrespect came seemingly out of thin air and began to take hold.  Even students and horses I had found, started and trained (who were doing well) began moving to other barns to pursue work I had thoroughly laid the foundation for, without explanation.  So I broke my 5 year contract less than half way through and left.  My excuse was I was burnt out on the never ending work load, wanted more time to work with my own horses, and didn’t want to deal with the high school ‘mean’ stuff that was probably a part of all barns.  But really, I might have stayed there and worked forever if I had continued to feel appreciated by most, but especially those that were looking good for the A show ring.  Looking back now I’m convinced our nice situation was poisoned by someone with enough clout that a few words in the wrong direction would set things unraveling.  But, at this point I had no idea what I was up against. And so I felt sad, but chalked it up to whatever, that’s life, and moved on.

​

At this point I ended up moving to Lockwood, California, and began my short career as a journalist and federal congressional aide.  Some wonderful friends opened their land and home to us, and my boyfriend and I enjoyed a couple year period of doing the regular job thing. I trained horses and taught a bit on the side and more thoroughly learned to shoe horses.  Looking back though a rustic life style, it was a good time surrounded by great people, beautiful land and tremendous learning.

I then moved North of Sacramento to Corning, CA to lease a farm in another attempt to make it as a professional in a different capacity (mainly training, competing and selling horses).  Despite some success (at one point I had 10 outside horses in training) the collapse of the economy directly after the 9-11 attack made it impossible to sell and maintain (so I believed).  So, I let go of everything possible, packed up and moved back to my parent’s farm in Wisconsin. 

​

In 2000 I gave up on the pursuit of the high powered A circuit grand prix aspect of horses, was married, started breeding horses to appease my own sensibilities, put on small horse shows, had a little teaching program, a part time job on the side, and lived a pretty normal low key life.  Then Cradilo came along (see Cradilo’s story for more information). 

​

This stallion and everything that came with him represented the end of that married small lifestyle (for a time) and the beginning of something new.  It appeared the chance of riding Grand Prix had followed me from California and dropped right in to my lap in the middle of Wisconsin.  Revived by Cradilo’s miraculous recovery in 2006 thru 2007, and feeling like maybe the upper level horse industry wasn’t completely done with me yet, I jumped into showing in the Midwest with the Irish Draught.

​

My first experience in Chicago trying to break Cradilo and I into the Grand Prix ring in 2007 was a less than stellar one.  Chicago welcomed me with two unknown parties complaining to the USEF steward that I was warming up illegally (ie jumping a warm up fence backwards, which could have left me disqualified) followed by breaking in to my horse trailer and robbing me of everything I needed to continue competing that week.  It was a clear message of we don’t want you here, as they carefully took down every one of the dozens of ribbons I had collected over the years hanging up throughout my trailer, stole my washed riding clothes hanging out to dry, and even took Cradilo’s grain for the week (along with several more valuable possessions).  This was not about money. 

​

It was very personally hurtful, as my entire family was from Chicago and Rockford (right down the road from Roscoe), I was born in Rockford, my Uncle had ridden on this circuit for years, and two of my great grand-parents were Illinois state representatives and senators for several decades. It definitely wasn’t the home coming I was expecting, and I didn’t understand why the hatred for my maybe third rated horse show in that area in 6 or 7 years?  I suspected it had something to do with the intensity of the George-Chris experience, as Chris was from Illinois and his family still worked professionally there, but obviously I couldn’t prove it and still to this day I don’t really have a clue who did it. 

​

I should also note here, Chicago is now one of my favorite venues to compete in.  It took a while, but eventually the persistence and ‘do or die’ attitude of the stallion and I for the most part won those folks over fully.  In many ways, I now feel the most welcome and well cared for in that venue, and though it can be a hard one for me to get to (and to have my usually green horses properly prepared for) it is one of the shows I now call home with many trainers and show staff I consider friends. 

    

So Cradilo and I had a decent 5 plus year show career given his original retired from any hope of competition status, and when his owner finally got on board financially towards the end, life was pretty good.  It didn’t last though, as she went from being my best friend who spent Christmas with us and talked about moving to be near the stallion and I, to disappearing in a very strange and mysterious way for 6 months.  I was then sued for the return of the stallion (I counter sued for the many years I had campaigned and trained the stallion), and the rest is history (see Cradilo’s story).

 

This was another surreal experience.  My lawyer was convinced we had won the case by the end of the day.  The judge had admitted I was entitled to something called ‘unjust enrichment’, and I had the only expert witness verifying the increase in the stallion’s value as a result of my efforts alone.  Despite this, the judge casually dismissed the case (stating as far as he was concerned a draft should be pulling a cart in a field), the horse was returned and I was left with nothing.  It was shocking to me and my lawyer. 

​

The owners had manipulated the truth claiming a fire had destroyed the supposedly legal lease I had on the horse, and their lawyer went on a rampage about my standing within the Rolex Grand Prix rankings, basically insinuating I wasn’t an established enough horseman in this realm to accomplish anything.  Which was even more shocking, because none of the parties (other than me) knew anything about the A circuit show world.  I tried to explain that to rank at this level you had to generally be on the Grand prix circuit constantly (extremely expensive), usually with multiple horses and it was ridiculous to even bring this up in this single horse and rookie grand prix rider scenario. 

​

It was such an odd and flat out injust experience that I was convinced the judge must have been bribed.  But looking back on it now I think there were other forces at work.  A top horseman with medals and books to back him, supporting my adversaries in this realm would have completely justified and judge’s (and later state appeal court’s) non flippant attitude.  Who was I to think I had the right to come up against such a reputation and resources?  And if I had won the hundreds of thousands of dollars at that point, my professional life forward would have looked much different.

​

So I lost the stallion in February of 2012, but continued on in my typical persistent manner with his offspring.  I took his oldest daughter to the 5 year old Young Jumper Championship finals in Lexington which we won third in (and were a hair’s breathe away from winning completely) and have since had a string of success stories in both the young jumper and open jumper ring with multiple offspring directly out of my breeding program.  In 2015, I learned I had a very serious neck injury resulting from multiple falls over the years (which could easily result in paralysis or death) and my focus turned to putting one of the off spring solidly in the Grand Prix ring and then selling it to someone who could hopefully carry on that goal.  I had been in the horse industry long enough to know serious 1.60m international Grand Prix horses were practically impossible to find, and if I could prove my breeding program would consistently produce strong potentials I would easily be able to sell for good prices and my business would be financially in good stead. 

   

I had been struggling to sell, even with horses winning in the Young Jumpers and Open Jumpers, but because there were so few by Cradilo and they were so rare and valuable I was determined to receive prices at least close to the going rate I knew other trainers were getting.  At this point I still didn’t quite get what I was up against (being black balled and professionally slandered by one of the top horseman in the world for over a decade) and just decided the industry was conservative and needed proof in the form of an Ace horse out there consistently competing at that level. 

​

So I managed to scrape the money together to push hard in 2016 for the Grand Prix ring with the two mares that had already proven they could do it in spite of a severely injured neck, and headed to the Hits Ocala Florida show in January of 2017.  While Fatima Ace had begun having confidence issues early in 2016 (right after I found out every time I jumped a fence I was risking my life, and as a result was a complete mental wreck for months) Deluca Ace continued to jump everything she was put in front of and became quite the little local rock star that year.

​

When we went to Florida Deluca had already won and ribboned in several 1.40s and even a couple of indoor 1.50m grand prixs.  I spent the season with the simple goal of proving to the industry that she was a real 1.60m Grand Prix prospect (ie had the scope, speed and heart) and trying to attract the attention of a serious buyer.  I ended up befriending and riding under Brandie Holloway, a well known accomplished grand prix rider in Ocala. And though I could of as it turned out sold the mare for considerably more money, I basically (compared to what was invested) gave her away.   There were some contingencies, but I was excited to have Hunter (Brandie’s rising star Grand Prix riding daughter) and Brandie Holloway have her in their very impressive program with a team of accomplished top horseman.

 

To start, we were all extremely happy with the situation, and Hunter and Deluca had a wonderful following 6 months of showing considering how new the team was together (and the fact that this was a sensitive, powerful, hot mare that it had taken me 6 years of patience to bring along).  They won multiple large open 1.30m classes, ribboned in 1.40ms and successfully completed a 1.60m well at the largest shows throughout the summer.  Brandie then took over the ride and won a Welcome and had one rail in the Prix at the Lake St. Louis, MO show that fall (which I made the 8 hour drive in the car to witness). 

​

Previously, on the way home from Florida in March of 2016, I dropped Fatima Ace (who I had backed off the Grand Prix ring to re train and bring her confidence up but was now solidly competitive again at 1.20m) off at Erik Hasbrouck’s farm in North Salem, NY (a nationally known Grand Prix rider and course designer) to honor a debt with an student-investor and attempt to sell the mare.  I’ve blogged about this repeatedly, but to make a long story short I retrieved the mare after a failed sale to find her at least a 100 pounds under weight with every rib showing, dead lame, and with stitches in her head.

 

This is a horse who had never had a physical problem of any significance and to this day stays fat on two handfuls of grain.  She was a top young jumper, a proven capable 1.50m horse (or consistently 1.40m at the very least) and she was for competitive purposes destroyed (I have yet to compete her since).  Her head hung between her front legs for three days, and I seriously did not know if she was going to survive the ordeal, emotionally or physically.  These clients, who were some of my best friends and who I recommended to Erik, who I honored every aspect of our investment deal with, were then completely turned against me.  They contacted every single person I know via facebook and email telling them I had defrauded them, and have been harassing me with lawyers ever since. 

 

This same scenario over and over, for 20 years, escalating as I close in on succeeding, and who has the clout in this industry to repeatedly instigate these kind of results?  So you would think the industry would finally rally behind me?  My top US bred horse was documented abused while under a top Grand Prix riding course designing horseman’s care, and the opposite happened.

 

Brandie Holloway stopped speaking to me.  We went from her sending me phone videos of Deluca winning a Welcome Prix the fall of 2016 to shortly thereafter ‘I don’t want to hear from you again.’  Even though we had a contract on Deluca that granted the name ACE (my breeding acronym) stay with her, I be given a percentage of any future sale on her, and I'm able to breed to her if she is injured or I get her back upon retirement.  And do you know what instigated this falling out?  They took the Ace off of her name via USEF (it went from Deluca Ace to Momma).  I complained, she stated it was a mistake (it’s intentional paperwork and a fee to change a name, so not true), I dared to threaten legally despite the clear breached contract, and she changed it back to Momma Ace. 

​

But in 2017 they completely stopped showing the mare.  According to USEF show records one client has ridden her in the 1.10m division at one week of shows.  I asked Hunter this summer in Chicago what was going on with the horse, was she lame? (i.e. could I get her back for breeding?) and she told me she was at home fine and they simply had no reason to have her at the shows.  This was the best looking horse I’ve produced so far for the Grand Prix ring (without a doubt better than her foundation sire), 6 years of training and investment, and I loved this mare because she was simply wonderful in the show ring.  When I talked to Brandie’s clients in Missouri about Deluca, multiple young women told me everyone in the barn agreed unanimously the mare was amazing. 

     

And here’s the straw that has broken the camel’s back and led me to tell this story, make it public and finally legally go after a group that has been actively and corruptly working against me for decades.  The fall of 2016, Hunter Holloway, who was third in the Regional ASPCA Medal Maclay finals in Missouri, won the national medal Maclay final, with guess who judging?  That’s right … George Morris. And then shortly thereafter Ace is taken off of Deluca’s name, and then after I force the issue and it is put back on, and the mare never sees the show ring (above 1.10m) again.  Now is it just me?  Come on guys … this is ridiculously obvious.  I mean, between Fatima and Deluca, the message is clear.  We can do whatever we want, criminal or not, and there is nothing you can do about it except watch yourself be blackballed out of financial survival.

​

When was the last time a rider from Kansas, competing out of Ocala in the winter (not West Palm Beach) won the National Medal Maclay finals?  Let me think … ah … can we say never?  George Morris is the international renowned Equitation legend.  All equitation finals, but especially the ASPCA Medal Maclay, the most prestigious, is his baby.  Why does an 18 year old rider who has already beat most top riders in the world at some point in the Grand Prix ring need to win a 1.10m equitation final?  Equitation is designed to produce jumper riders … not prove that they are already there.

​

 If a dressage rider were winning at the Grand Prix level, would it make any sense for them to go back to a nationally recognized first level test and win?  And would it be a big deal if they did?  If a NFL football player was helping the team to win at the national level, would he go back to college and be excited about winning the MVP of the year.  Of course they wouldn’t.  So why does it happen in the equitation world? 

​

Because George Morris (and others) have a corrupt political strangle hold on this industry (which has been inadvertently backed by USEF and multiple prestigious publications), and there is no (at least there didn’t use to be) riding on an international team for this country (no matter how good you or your horse are) without his thumbs up.  And it is common knowledge among hunter-jumper professionals. 

​

Did Hunter deserve to win the Maclay finals?  Other than the fact that in my opinion a multiple year winning Grand Prix rider really doesn’t need to be in them, absolutely.  Did she need some serious political backing to accomplish this given where she is from, where she winters and the geographical nature of politics in this sport (how many riders East of the Mississippi River have you seen on international teams?)  Absolutely.  Did George use shutting down my mare as leverage?  I’m sure of it.

​

Why?  Because I’m loud in writing at least, as I've consistently proven, I’m good at what I do, I have great horses, and I am right on the verge of having the resources to prove it (the only thing that has ever really stopped me in this industry). And if Deluca was in the 1.60m ring competitive with Hunter or Brandie, I would have a high dollar international waiting list for the 3-5 five horse left in existence out of this breeding program, which I am willing to sell.

​

I can easily point out George Morris’ lack of horsemanship in spite of accomplishments.  I’ve experienced it directly, and unless you are blinded by famed hero worship I’m pretty sure I’ve done it fairly convincingly here. And even more severe, I can point out the extreme political corruption that has in an unwarranted and unfounded manner worked directly against my career (and I’m sure many others) for 20 years.  It’s not quite the stellar reputation George wants to end on, when he’s so carefully managed every aspect of his image as a top international horseman and just a really caring nice guy.

 

If you were born in to the right family in the right location, have the right trust fund behind you, and are willing to bow down to him, no questions asked; then yes, he’s a great guy to have on your team.  But does that make it OK for him to destroy a career, encourage others to destroy multiple horse’s prospective careers, which is what he has attempted and sometimes accomplished with me and my animals at every turn?

 

So, anyway, all this stinks, obviously.  A great deal of damage that can never be undone has already been done, and it is by any normal human’s standards really unfair.  But life’s unfair, right?  Well, I'm not telling this story to be a martyr. I’m writing it because I’m a competitor, and have every intention of winning the long game.  This means the  right to earn a living and not be black balled in the Grand Prix show jumping world which is very small at the top, because I made the wrong move with the wrong influential power monger (though the right move for the horse as far as any sensitive horseman would be concerned) 20 years ago.  Despite the horror of all of it, here’s philosophically how I look at it, and what allows me to sleep (usually) at night. 

    

I believe we all have a spiritual side (a soul), and we all have an ego.  It’s the age old devil on one shoulder, and angel on the other.  I don’t believe any one person is all bad, or any one person can be all good.  The only question is, what voice on which shoulder is running things?  So while I have a particular disdain for those that seem to want to collect an ordinate amount of power, wealth and accolades, particularly when at the same time they are working hard at keeping others down and in their idea of their respective place, I have to admit we all play some part in allowing the devil on the shoulder to run the show. 

​

For example, why did it take this long and my back completely to the wall before I was willing to publically address what I’ve suspected for some time?  And can you really blame the little guy or even the middle guy for bending the rules when the corruption starts at the top, and there doesn’t seem to be any way to even be in the game (much less win it) without following their ever powerful and forceful lead?

​

You know guys, the days of strong men being seen as leaders and strong women being seen as witches (or having a letter A sewn to their chest) is coming to an end.  And the days of simply being able to call a women crazy and dismiss her, because she is willing to call someone in power on their bs, or has ideas that don’t agree with theirs and is willful enough to espouse them, is also coming to an end.  It’s sad to me that the sport I love, the only sport in the Olympic Games in which men and women compete equally, at the end of the day seems to still be about having the right man in your corner (or definitely not the wrong one against you).

 

Do you really want the world to be a better place?  Then recognize that strong women (who seem to be the most hated in our society by both sexes) are not always but often the ones that are going to curb that male ego, that sometimes does a beautiful job of showing up as a sheep in wolves clothing, and often wants to run this world into the ground.  How many women tend to start wars and shoot up public spaces?  But if the old boys club consistently works to undermine and shut them down, rather than respect their take on things and give them a fair shot at playing the game, then that arrogant club has laid the perfect foundation for this world continuing to spin out of control.

 

I believe our spirit, the part of us that knows that path to every good thing we all seek, speaks to us through inspiration.  For example, as much as I’d like to go about my merry life developing great horses, hanging out with good friends, and generally working to avoid the harshness of much of the real world, I find myself both forced and inspired to 100% honestly ‘no holds barred’ regularly address the industry I’ve chosen to pursue a business in.  And on this particular day, quite shockingly to those that don’t know what's up at least, I’m sure. 

​

I know my horses are incredible and more than worth the prices we’ve all earned and I’m asking … they are my universal reward for sticking it out within the brutally difficult aspects of this world.  I know there are many of you who see what they are and who want them, very simply because I’ve spoken to you or your agents.  If you feel inspired to consider buying, but find yourself taken aback by the intensity of the enemies surrounding me (and drawn in to their lies, the only thing they have to work with), I would ask that you realize it’s 99% smoke and mirrors, and that dog has very little bite left.  There’s obviously a reason we’re such a threat, and in a way it’s flattering and I would think it would inspire more to take us seriously (though hopefully in a positive way!)

​

At the very least I do not want to hear complaints of the state of the world from those unwilling to step beyond their comfort zone, follow their own spiritually guided inspiration, and take on that dragon (no matter how big) that ultimately is the source of all suffering.  If we nipped that out of control ego in the bud before it could collect an inordinate amount of power and rule with an unfair iron fist, the beauty and resources of this world would prosper (instead of fighting to survive in the hands of a few), we would find ourselves in a position to easily connect spiritually and follow our hearts and dreams, and we would all be considerably happier. 

​

The horse industry doesn’t save lives, feed people or produce things folks need, but it does represent a high expression of art and sport. And it is a testament to the universal resources that can allow one to pursue excellence in quite an unusual and deeply nature connected manner.  Horses have been an expression of a peoples and nation’s culture for thousands of years, and the statement we put forward regarding who we are in that age old partnership still matters. So what is the United States saying right now about itself and it’s long tradition of work in the equine field, by allowing a relentlessly pursued American dream to be virtually destroyed by an unbridled self preserving ego backed by money, power and status within the industry?

 

It’s just my opinion, but one I have definitely more than earned the right to express.       

​